Marla Stumpff
Memorial website in the memory of your loved one

This memorial website was created in the memory of our beloved Marla who was born on August 21, 1979 and passed away on September 16, 2007 at the age of 28. As she is forever in our hearts, she will always be with us.


Marla, our daughter, our beautiful daughter, is gone from this earth in her youth, but she will never be gone from our hearts and minds. 
Born in Maryland but transplanted to Long Beach, CA at age one, our early memories include Marla riding her big wheel in front of the house with our black and white Springer Spaniel Oreo. There was rarely a time that she did not have a dog of her own that she loved deeply. She loved her dogs and later all dogs for dogs are loyal and that is a quality she expected in everyone. Among our memories of pre-school is the clubhouse the boys built with a sign that read ”Girls keep out, except Marla”. She was a tomboy and afraid of nothing. Our memories include her about seven years of age, climbing trees and jungle gyms. Always physically fit and tough as nails on the outside, she was soft on the inside. She just wanted to be loved unconditionally.

At eight years of age and twenty years ago, we moved to Plantation, FL. School, ballet and a series of jobs and relationships followed. We were proud of her accomplishments and feel she had many. But because of her high standards, she was often disappointed. Unlike the dogs in her short life, she felt disappointed, betrayed and abandoned by others. Her standards were her own and not always conventional. Her decisions and opinions were difficult to change once formulated and set in her mind. She kept her dark and sad feelings mainly private. Life and relationships were going to be on her terms. To give you an idea, her MySpace website profile when addressing who she would like to meet, Marla’s response was “I’d like to meet people who are real…tired of fake ‘wanna be’s’. I expect people to treat me with the same respect and dignity I treat others with and if you can’t do that, then you might as well keep on walking”.

She liked music and the color purple. She painted occasionally-a trait that seems to run in the family. She loved to dance and could she dance. To her family she was beautiful, bright, and loved. She was and is our baby girl.

Her life on earth was tragically short but in our hearts and minds she will live forever. Without her the sun will never shine as brightly, the ocean will never be as blue, and our lives will never be a joy.

The pain of losing a child is overwhelming. But it must pale in comparison to the pain Marla felt. Nothing and no one can hurt or disappoint her now. She is laid to rest today, at peace with the world and herself.

If you have lost someone you love to suicide, please follow this link:

It remains a wound that I carry with me: it lies deep and cannot be healed.  After years it will be the same as it was the first day.

Vincent Van Gogh

From CS Lewis'
A grief observed:

Tonight all the hells of young grief have opened again; the mad words, the bitter resentment, the fluttering in the stomach, the nightmare unreality, the wallowed-in tears.

For in grief nothing "stays put". One keeps on emerging from a phase, but it always recurs. Round and round. Everything repeats.

Am I going in circles, or dare I hope I am on a spiral? But if a spiral, am I going up or down it?

How often - will it be for always? How often will the vast emptiness astonish me like a complete novelty and make me say, "I never realized my loss till this moment?"

Nothing Gold Can Stay
by: Robert Frost

Nature's first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leaf's a flower;
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf.
So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.

It has been said, 'time heals all wounds.' I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, [protecting its sanity], covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But, it is never gone."

-Rose Fitzgerald Kennedy

By Carol Rothwell

There you are
walking on the beach
Head tossing back
laughing happily.
For a split second
you are here….
Then I remember,
you are gone….
It isn't you -
Pain enters my heart,
and it breaks
Yet again


Gates of Prayer - Reform Judaism Prayer Book

As long as we live, they too will live;
For they are now a part of us:
As we remember them!


Tributes and Condolences
why?  / Brandy Grayson (friend)
I don't understand
Why you had to go away,
I wasn't done,
I had much more to say.

There were so many things
I wanted to share with you,
So many things,
Left for us to do.

I should've made yo...  Continue >>
Beautiful Marla   / Barb
What a beautiful tribute to your beautiful daughter.  I lost my 33 year son to suicide on June 13, 2007.  I know the pain, heartache and guilt you are feeling.  My thoughts will be with you always and I hope Marla and Mike both are at ...  Continue >>
Thanksgiving 2014   / Arline Marla's Mom (Mother)
My darling Marla, This year we were in SC for Thangsgiving, just the three of us. Somehow, I feel some small sense of peace in this little house, I wonder often if you would have liked visiting here. Dad and I tried cooking the first Thanksgiving ...  Continue >>
For Marla   / Arline Stumpff (Mom)
My dearest daughter,
Six years ago today, you were unconscious in a hospital bed, and tomorrow your delicate body couldn't fight anymore and you left this world. Did you know, did you have the awareness that your dad and I were by your bedside ...  Continue >>
For Marla   / Arline Stumpff (Mom)
My dearest daughter,
Six years ago today, you were unconscious in a hospital bed, and tomorrow your delicate body couldn't fight anymore and you left this world. Did you know, did you have the awareness that your dad and I were by your bedside ...  Continue >>
Still missing you!  / Glenn Pardo (Friend)    Read >>
Where Did You Go?  / Danielle Poffenbarger (One of Marla's Best Friends In High School )    Read >>
Missing you  / Brandy Grayson (Friend)    Read >>
Marla, a girl I knew once in 3rd grade  / Katie Brown-McLinskey (friend (1999-2002) )    Read >>
My Sorrow  / David Staggs (Friend of Arline )    Read >>
"So Far Away"  / Jessica Morano (friend)    Read >>
SO SAD  / David Staggs (Friend of Arline )    Read >>
Cryin' For Me by Toby Keith  / Brandy Grayson (friend)    Read >>
Quote from Ralph Waldo Emerson  / Cathy Voelker (Cousins)    Read >>
My thoughts are with you  / Michelle Crawford     Read >>
More tributes and condolences...
Click here to pay tribute or offer your condolences
Her legacy
Marla's friend, Glenn Pardo, wrote this for her funeral service  

When I met Marla she was only 17. We were roommates twice and friends for many years. We used to joke that she was the female version of me, just as stubborn too. She's the only girl who ever punched me in the face, yet I wasn’t angry we just laughed about it. She was the life of the party and it wasn’t a Saturday night without Marla. She believed in loyalty and honesty to a friend more than anyone I've ever known. Whether you had known her a couple of months or your whole life you knew that Marla had a big heart. I know that you would have been a lifelong friend and I will always miss you. We love you Marla. 


Marla's Photo Album
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